29 November 2011
29 November 2011
My fellow Americans, what’s more American than cashing in with no cash? Black Friday shopping was BRUTAL this past weekend. I got jostled, shoved around and groped -- and that was just the TSA at the airport. The good news is sales for Black Friday were up 6%. The bad news is the most popular items were pepper spray and guns to protect yourself from other shoppers. Maybe they should change the name to Black & BLUE Friday. There were several Black Friday attacks, parking lot robberies, 3 shootings, 2 macings -- or as Walterboro calls it: FRIDAY.
Speaking of blackness on Fridayness ... lots of families gather around the ol' boob tube for traditional family holiday movies, but these are MODERN times. To wit; here are the top 5 WORST holiday TV specials:
1) Leftovers (The Musical)
2) Rick Perry's "We Two Kings of Orient Are."
3) Frosty The Beer Mug.
4) Here Comes Santa Claus (and this time he's PISSED).
5) Ruby The Red-Nosed Hooker.
Hey hey Donna; what's the best thing about having family in for the Holidays? Them not knowing what you did to the food before you served them.
Speaking of germy squirmy ... George Michael had to cancel lots of tour dates, because he's contracted pneumonia. Of all the things he COULD have caught in all those public restrooms, he comes up with PNEUMONIA? Hey hey Donna; what do George Michael and Evel Kenevel have in common? Skid marks on their helmet.
And Rolling Stone Magazine has named Jimi Hendrix as "Greatest Guitar Player In History." Keith Richards finished 4th, but he DID come first in the WHEELCHAIR division.